Presence…The life in living!

This picture came to me as a great re-enforcement of the power of presence.

That concept of presence is so absent to many while we carry on with our regular daily lives.

Being present has merely been restricted to being physically available at a place. Being present has become more of hearing something rather than actual listening. Being present is taken as looking at something, even if not seeing it. Is this what is meant by being present, or the word presence?

This question along with another very important one, came up for me when I started giving my presence to this picture concerned. And the other question was when did this get so deeply rooted in our lives? When did being present just for the sake of it, became standard for us?

As I do with most things, I went deep inside me and back into my own life, to search for the answers.

The answer to the first question was sound and clear, and all it described ‘presence’ as was to feel the life in every moment. See here, I am not saying ‘living the moment’, because even living today has also been misunderstood as something which merely an act of breathing-in and breathing-out.

When I say feel the life, I am asking for not just passing by things or people or places, but instead making them a part of our experience, a part of our lives.

Let me give a couple of examples and I am sure that will make things easier to understand.

Have you ever bought a sofa or a chair for yourself? No, no, I am not trying to become Dr Jehangir khan of the movie ‘Dear Zindagi’. But the question remains valid still. If the answer is yes, think of the time when you first went shopping for it. How did you choose the one you purchased finally?

Did you not sit on it and moved around experiencing all possible corners and edges of it? Did you not feel the touch of the texture? Were you not mindful of how it will fit in the décor of your house? Did you not see its shape and size, to make sure that it fits where you planned?  And for some, did you not even close your eyes and allow something to tell you, this is the one? 

I am sure the answer is ‘YES’ for most of us.

And now answer another question. Do you experience the same chair, the same way, every-time you sit on it?

I am sure the answer is ‘NO’ for most of us.

And that is the exact difference between ‘being merely present’ and ‘presence’. JUST LIVE EVERY MOMENT. Allow yourself to be immersed in whatever you are doing and wherever you are.

You know when I spoke about this to someone, their one big apprehension was “Immersing oneself takes time, how can I do that it with every moment.”? And my answer was as simple as it could get. I asked just a question and the person smiled, having understood what I meant and having got his question answered. The question was, ‘How many moments does it take to Immerse yourself in that one moment?’

Let me give you another example so that what presence is becomes clear for all.

Think of the last time when you looked at your hand. Yes, your hand, your hand, it can either be the left one or the right one. May be today itself, a few minutes back, or may be just now when I asked this question. What all did you notice about this hand of yours? Do you have a few things to say?

Ok now look at the same hand again, and try and Live it, being in the presence of it, trying to notice those fine lines which get missed but were always there, may be a few marks, which become so much a part that they remain unnoticed, a few spots or some places of extra sheen, which were earlier unnoticed. Yes, yes, you are seeing the very same hand you looked at earlier. The only difference, ‘presence’ was not absent this time.

Having made clear what presence is, surprisingly the answer to the second question was staring at me right there, without making much of an effort.

It has been such a smooth transition for us from seeking attention and presence as toddlers at the comfort of our homes with our very own people and safe space, to changing into students who learn to use the word ‘present’, just for the sake of it.

I am sure most of us will be able to relate to what I am saying and must have understood what I am talking about, by reading the previous paragraph. If not, please read again and see what shows up for you.

Yes, I am talking about the great old ‘Roll Calls’ during each class period in our school days. The drill of the teacher taking our names and we simply being taught by the same teacher to respond saying ‘Present Miss/Present Ma’am/Present Sir’.  What should have been a means of igniting the ‘presence’ of each student for the class ahead, remained as a mere tool of ‘recording physically being present’ in that same room.

And though the school days get over at some point in our lives, what we got so used to ignoring for almost 7-8 times a day, for close to 160 days a year, for almost 15 years of our lives, stays with us and deprives us of knowing what actual presence is, at times for the rest of our lives.

Does presence make such a huge difference? My own experience says ’YES’. Then why don’t we realise it that strongly? How can we realise what is being missed in our lives, when we are not present in its absence?

It can only be understood when we start understanding and practising ‘presence’ in the small and regular tasks in our lives. And before I end, let me give you the most important and the closest two things to start with. Be present to your breath and be present to the rhythm of your heartbeat. Try this and see how far we have come from ‘presence’ in our lives, but the good part is, it also tells how close it is to still getting hold of it.

Live it all! Love it all!

And yes, BTW my washroom has 97 tiles. And two of them with little cracks on them.

Much Love,

DeepCoachRB